August 19, 2011

and The Bullshit Continues

I am so glad this week is over. It’s been one thing after another and the stars of this week are my two daughters. It was suppose to be a wonderful , drama free week but I guess I was sooooo wrong to even assume that could possibly be the case. ….the only thing that I was looking forward to even after all the drama was my daughters 20th birthday party/family get together which was going to be held this Sunday. 

I wanted my daughter to remember this quick visit and why not send her home with memories of family around her celebrating her birthday. So her aunt and I were working together for a couple weeks now coming up with ideas, people to invite, what to serve…….and considering people are on a budget it wasn’t going to be anything extravagant. Streamers, balloons, hanging ceiling decorations….nothing over the top. For food I was thinking pizza and the family members agreed to bring a dish ….sort of pot luck style. Now, the only thing was to get in touch with her father (my ex husband) to collect his half which was $30. 

Seems fair right??

I wasn’t going to ask him to go in half for the decorations….that’s my thing and I enjoy it. It was around 3pm today when I heard from my daughter, stating that this birthday thing is just out of control. “Excuse me?” ……she has not been part of this at all and I’m not stressing about it so why is she? She stated that all she wanted was a BBQ that’s it! and all that needs to be spent is $20. I laughed….I explained that $20 is NOT going to feed even half of her father’s side of the family. She then rudely stated “well I DON’T want Pizza!!! Whats wrong with having a BBQ?”. I explained to her that her father’s side of the family is big, which means we would need a lot of hamburger meat, hot dogs, buns, condiments, chips, sodas….and I’m pretty sure people are going to want more than just 1 hamburger….so to keep the price down I was going to get 4 pizzas, a cake and drinks and people would bring a side dish. “I just don’t want this party anymore, just forget about it I told you I didn’t want a big thing” she yelled. I explained this wasn’t a big thing just family getting together…….she then told me that she just didn’t want to do this anymore and that she will come over Saturday and we can do cake. I calmly said “I will take the decorations back and call your aunt so we can cancel the party”…and hung up.

I held the anger /disappointment and MY TONGUE till I got outside the office and called the Mister. “She doesn’t want to have it, she doesn’t WANT pizza, she doesn’t understand that having a BBQ is going to cost A LOT more than pizza…..ohhh and get this we can have cake on Saturday…..screw the cake! Doesn’t she see that we were doing this for HER?” …..of course I’m leaving out the explicit I would probably be banned from blogger!!  

So I called her aunt and left a message about the cancellation per her nieces request and sent out a bulk text stating that I was sorry for any inconvience that this last minute cancellation  may have caused. 

Ohhh about that cake she thinks she’s going to have when she comes over on Saturday night…….not going to happen.  She’s not going to dictate how she wants to celebrate NOW when we have already talked about this for months…….no sorry. She just doesn’t get it……………she doesn’t see the love that was put behind the planning and family members who were coming to join her …..she doesn’t see the good intention behind the thought that we were going to celebrate her. We don’t see her much during the year because she is in college………… this was more than just a birthday party or family get together …..this was about HER being with us and US celebrating her before she leaves. This was our way of showing her that we are proud of her.