I knew as of last October that my parents chose to change their destination from California to Vegas. I was told by my father that they were trading in their tickets and going to Vegas to celebrate my mothers retirement. Not completely stunned by their actions I did remind my father that they did promise their grand kids; my children that they would visit them this past summer…..which came ……and went. With that he bypassed the subject and continued on with the conversation.
Today I received a call from my mom, hesitant to answer I picked up after the 5th ring and took a deep breath. She began to tell me that they had plan a “last minute” trip to Vegas next weekend and was wondering if we could come up. “Last minute?”….i believe not. I began to tell her that there would be no way that we could afford to take not only us but our four kids to Vegas next weekend. So I simply asked if they could take a day and drive down to us and visit their grandchildren which they haven’t seen in ….years. To that she stated that they weren’t driving to Vegas they were flying so they weren’t going to rent a car. She kept stating that this was a spontaneous trip which was beyond the truth and finally I told her that I knew that this wasn’t a spare of the moment, fly by the seat of their pants trip. One, they aren’t those type of people and 2. They are all about planning things out in advance. I told her that I knew that they had planned this for awhile and again there would be no way for us to come out next weekend which also happens to be Super Bowl Weekend!!!!
Knowing that I just caught her in a lie, she started to stammer over her words and I just started to get highly annoyed ….no that’s wrong I was getting angry. I told her that I would have to go because I was still at work, all the while I was feeling that lump in my throat and I knew at any minute the tears would come. Tears of disappointment……tears that I held back for nearly a year.
Sitting at my desk I felt the heat rise throughout my body and tears of anger rolled down. How dare she…how dare them!!! It’s only a 3 hour drive from Vegas to our house in California……it’s a longer trip from their place in Wisconsin to Illinois where my sister lives and from time to time they will visit their grandkids and take them back with them. They have gone out of their way to visit my oldest daughter who’s attending college in Kansas….now from what I can recall in geography class, Kansas and Wisconsin is more than a 3 hour drive.
Why do they make the effort to see my sister and her family and refuse to see their oldest daughter and their grandkids? Actually I could care less if they see me but they need to see their grandchildren, that’s what is important and what better way to celebrate the Superbowl and the win of our Packers then to have a BBQ with family. Obviously to them that doesn’t seem to be that important.
Bottom line…..this is their choice. My only disappointment is that they are missing out in spending time with amazing grandkids, meeting my husband and having a nice time with family……but again from what my counselor has told me time and time again that I shouldn’t expect anything from them because it will only lead to disappointment. ……”They are not the parents your sister has” even though they ARE, they will never be.
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